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drunkinyourbenz · 10 days ago

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jealous billie smut?

୨ৎ only girl. b.e

୨ৎ billie eilish x fem!reader

୨ৎ genre: smut and fluff

୨ৎ content: more sub top billie bc...yeah. oral (r recieving), jealousy, possesivness, fingering (r recieving), teasing

୨ৎ note: this request has been rotting away in my inbox and i know for a fact that you 100% wanted dom billie but idc <3 have some subillie bc i love her !! this is like half edited bc i got bored

the girl’s hand was on your waist before you had even noticed her walking across the room to you. by the time your eyes flickered down to where her hand rested, you could feel your girlfriend’s eyes burning into the back of your head from where she stood by the bar. she had given herself the task of getting drinks for the two of you, but you were well aware that was the last thing on her mind now.

you took the girl’s wrist, smoothly slipping it off your waist and giving her a look that would’ve told anyone else everything they needed to know. unluckily for you, this girl was either drunk off her face or just didn’t care.

it made you uncomfortable—you hated the idea of flirting with anyone but billie, and you knew billie would get jealous. although, she was adorably desperate to make sure you knew she could please you best when she was jealous, so…maybe it wasn't all bad.

billie had always been jealous, you learnt that fact a few months into your relationship. it wasn’t in a destructive way, it was in a quiet way. she would effortlessly pull your attention away from anyone else, giving them a cold stare until they took the hint. she’d stay quiet, her jealousy bubbling below the surface until she finally got you somewhere private and that’s when it really came out. she was your only girl, she was the only one who could make you feel good, she was your whole world—and she knew it. she just needed to prove it.

“you know, i’d love to–”

“i’m taken.” your words were final, and billie’s hand sliding around your waist only solidified that fact. she didn’t say anything to the girl, simply used her hand on your waist to turn you towards her. it was always cute seeing her putting on that fake confidence—because you knew that if she spoke, she’d be stumbling over her words.

you smiled at her, leaning closer to her to press a kiss to her lips, “hi, baby.”

the girl from before—who had almost been totally forgotten—looked the two of you up and down before rolling her eyes and letting out a scoff, “whatever. you’re so boring.”

you let her words pass through you as if she hadn’t even spoken, and you heard another soft scoff before the girl walked away. you felt billie’s hand on your waist noticeably relax as the two of you were left alone, a soft breath slipping from her lips. “god, i hate these parties.”

she didn’t hate the parties, she hated seeing people all over you—and rightfully so. you were hers, and she was yours. no question about it.

a breathy laugh left you as your lips brushed softly against her ear, “yeah? you know you’re my only girl, mhm?”

she hummed softly, her eyes darting around the party as if assessing something. it was crowded, loud, and the friends that the two of you were here with were nowhere to be found. “can we leave?”

you nodded softly, a knowing smile painting your face, “why d’you wanna leave, sweet girl?”

she sent you a look, and the slightly tense look of her shoulders and her furrowed brows told you everything you needed to know. there was a certain desperation in her eyes, silently begging you not to make her spell it out for you. she knew you knew why she wanted to leave, you were simply teasing her.

you weren’t quite done with teasing her, so you brushed a strand of hair out of her eyes with a soft look in your eyes, “hm?”

her eyes stopped exploring the room, snapping back to yours with an undeniable look of utter desperation. she opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out. instead, she let out a soft, annoyed sigh, lacing her fingers with yours and pulling you towards the exit.

you couldn’t help but giggle softly at her frustration—her jealousy was adorable. it wasn’t mean jealousy, it was desperate jealousy. her jealousy only made her want you more, and considering how obsessed with you she already was, that was saying something.

she turned to glance at you as she tugged you towards the car, “stop laughing at me.” she was clinging to her frustrated act, despite both of you knowing full well that she adored your teasing. “you know exactly why i want to leave.”

you grinned at her, “of course i do. just want you to say it.”

she rolled her eyes, sending you a lighthearted glare, “you’re impossible.”

when you only winked in response, waiting for her to just admit it, she groaned, huffing softly. “fine. you know i’m jealous.”

“cute,” you mused, continuing to prompt her teasingly. “and you want to go home so you can…?”

she sent you another irritated look, “so i can make sure your eyes are only on me.”

jealous and possessive.

“believe me, my eyes were never on her.”

her lips twitched up into a barely noticeable satisfied smile, “and…never mind.” she trailed off, her eyes drifting to the floor.

oh, no. that wouldn’t do. “and…?”

she didn’t respond, she just opened the car door and slipped into the driver's seat. you sighed, getting in the passenger seat and putting your hand over hers before she could reach for the handbrake, “billie.” you murmured, your voice soft but warning. “tell me.”

billie’s eyes drifted down to your hands, staying silent for a moment before speaking in a soft voice, “wanna make sure i’m the only one who can make you feel good.”

the corner of your lips twitched up, “see, was that so hard?”

an unamused look was all you received, although you knew that deep down, she adored your teasing—you wouldn’t do it if she didn’t. “can i drive now?”

“yeah, baby.”

she wasted no time in reversing out of the parking space, starting the drive back to your house and not looking back at the club once. she was determined to get you home as soon as possible, to get you on your bed and her face between your thighs.

it was late, so there wasn’t too much traffic on the roads. the sound of soft rain pattered on the roof of the car, making the lights shine in dotted patterns against the glass of the windows. your eyes traveled over to billie when the two of you were brought to a stop at a red light, the bright city lights from outside the car shining onto her skin her pale blue eyes fixed on the road ahead.

you watched as her tongue darted out over her lips, and you knew that she was imagining everything she planned to do to prove she could make you feel better than anyone else ever could. you’d never doubted that, you honestly hadn’t even spared anyone else a single thought in the two years you’d been with billie. you simply liked seeing her hopeless desperation to please you when the jealousy took over.

billie’s jealousy was harmless, and had never once put your relationship at risk. she trusted you, and she knew that she was the only one on your mind. it was other people she didn’t trust, and she needed to make sure you knew she could please you best. more than anything, however, she needed reassurance. she needed reassurance that she was indeed the best, that she was doing a good job for you, that she was your good girl.

the moment the light turned green, the car was speeding off again. you could practically see the way her mind was racing with thoughts of how she planned to engrave herself in your mind, make sure you never forgot how much pleasure she could bring you and how devoted to you she was.

the drive was silent, an undeniable tension in the air—you both just wanted to get home and into the bedroom. once you arrived at your house, billie parked the car in the driveway and leaned over to unbuckle your seatbelt after undoing her own with a soft click. grabbing the back of your neck, she pulled slightly across the central console, your lips meeting in a hungry kiss as you let your hands thread through her hair.

“god, you have no idea how hot you were at that party. you don’t even have to try, do you? everything you do just drives me wild.” her words came out breathlessly before she pulled you back in for another kiss, her tongue slipping past your slightly parted lips.

when you pulled away from the kiss, she let out an impatient whine as she chased after your retreating lips. her eagerness made your lips twitch up into a subtle smirk, “inside.”

she let out a soft huff of air, but she knew that going inside would get her what she wanted sooner. so she opened the car door at the same time as you opened yours, both of you rushing to the door to escape the rain. she fumbled around in her bag for her keys with shaky hands, so you found your own keys to unlock the door for her.

she practically shoved you inside, only for the two of you to be met with your dog, shark, barrelling into you as you removed your shoes. his tail was wagging and he was practically bouncing off the walls, like a kid on christmas.

you crouched down to greet shark, patting his back and scratching behind his ears, “hi, my little baby shark. did you miss us?”

you heard your girlfriend sigh, her voice coming out impatient, and you could tell she was trying to hold back a whine threatening to escape her throat. her arms were crossed over her chest, her foot tapping softly on the carpet. “baby…”

you couldn't help the teasing smile that spread across your lips—she was so, so desperate, it actually made your heart race. “okay, okay,” you pressed a parting kiss to shark's forehead and muttered something about how you'd see him later.

billie’s hand circled around your wrist, tugging you up the stairs before you could finish whatever you were saying to shark. when she reached your shared bedroom, she shoved you through the door and closed it behind you. you couldn’t recall a time where she’d ever been quite this desperate, and you felt your stomach twist as she let out a breathy sigh and a barely audible, “please.”

your breath hitched in your throat at the look in her eyes as she gazed at you, seeing the utter devotion that she wasn’t even trying to hide now that the two of you were alone. you suck in a soft breath, watching her quietly for a moment.

“you need me?”

her eyes snapped up to meet yours, nodding frantically. she was silently pleading with you, begging for you to let her make you feel good. she needed you to reassure her that she was enough, that she could please you. she needed to be reminded that she was the centre of your universe.

you walked backwards until you felt the back of your thighs hit the mattress of your bed, and you sat down on the edge, gesturing for her to come closer. she closed the distance between the two of you in a few short strides, standing between your legs and looking down at you as you sat on the bed. her hands were trembling slightly—it was barely noticeable, but you noticed it. you noticed everything about her, you always did. she reached out to trace her shaky fingers across your cheek in an almost reverent touch, your eyelashes fluttering against her fingertips.

you leaned in, closing the gap between the two of you and feeling her practically melt in your arms. her hands slid down from your waist to your thighs, the tips of her fingers slipping under the waistband of your jeans, looking down at you with her big pleading blue eyes, an insatiable hunger burning within them.

“please? let me?”

you nodded in response to her question, and she instantly pushed you back so you were propped up against the pillows. you pulled your shirt over your head as she gently pulled your jeans off your legs. you heard a barely audible whimper leave her lips at the sight of you in just your bra and panties—and while you didn’t comment on it, you allowed it to give your ego a little boost.

first, she unclasped your bra and slipped the straps down your arms, discarding it on the floor by the bed. her lips latched onto your left nipple while her hand moved to squeeze and palm at your other boob. eventually, her lips trailed up from your breasts and to your neck, leaving a trail of love bites scattered behind her. the moment her lips were on your neck, she was sucking marks into your skin—marks that she knew you wouldn’t be able to hide. her voice was a soft whine, “mine.”

mine, mine, mine.

she settled down between your legs, propping herself up on one elbow while she gently pushed your thighs apart. her hand moved to trace a soft line down your inner thigh, eventually slipping under the lace of your panties and sliding through your folds. you heard her moan at the feeling of how wet you were, and the fact that she was so turned on from just that made your heart skip a beat.

she removed her finger, bringing it to her lips. you watched as her eyelashes fluttered and she moaned around her finger, and you felt yourself get impossibly wetter. she didn’t waste any time now that she’d tasted you, pulling your panties down your thighs and letting them fall to the side of the bed somewhere. her lips trailed up your inner thighs, her eyes permanently fixed on yours. attentive as always, she was watching your every reaction, every furrow of your brows and every inaudible breath that left your slightly parted lips. she’d always noticed every little detail, more than anyone else you’d ever met. it made you feel so…cared for.

soon enough, her tongue darted out to lick a stripe up your folds, and you heard her whimper at the taste. her eyes shut briefly, her nose bumping against your clit before she sucked the sensitive bud into her mouth. her eyes were open once again, looking up at you as she took in the clear bliss on your face. your clear pleasure seemed to encourage her.

soft moans spilled from your lips, “good girl.”

you watched as her eyes lit up with delight at the praise, a pleased murmur vibrating against your clit. her free hand snuck up to gently squeeze your breast, giving your nipple a teasing pinch.

one thing you knew was that you’d never get over the way she always looked in between your legs—needy and desperate, she’d do whatever you wanted and more if it meant she got to touch you. she sucked particularly harshly on your clit, drawing a sharp gasp from your lips and causing her searching eyes to snap back up to yours. her brows were furrowed as she watched you for a moment, pausing her movements. her voice was laced with concern when she spoke, “was that…too much? sorry, was i– uh, i can—”

you cut her off by tangling your hands in her hair and gently pushing her face back down between your legs, “you’re doing perfect.”

at those words, you watched as her shoulders visibly relaxed and she dove back in, her tongue eagerly working at your center. her eyes fluttered shut this time—this was bringing her just as much pleasure as it brought you. she needed to make you feel good, she didn’t feel complete until you’d fallen apart around her.

when your thighs closed slightly around her head, she used her hands to gently pry them open again, holding them in place as she ate you out. her nails dug gently into your skin, you knew they’d leave slight crescent indents in their place.

your back arched up off the bed slightly at the pleasure, and you watched as her eyes flickered up to meet yours.

“doing so good for me, baby. so perfect.”

her lips curled up into a smile, and her tongue darted out to lick between your folds again before she spoke, “you close?”

“so close.”

at that, her lips returned to your clit and she slipped two fingers inside of you, curling them perfectly and coaxing moans from you that made her grind against the bed subtly. your breath hitched as her tongue flicked against your clit, “fuck… that’s it, baby. so good for me, my only girl.”

those words were it—billie flicked her tongue against your clit again, curling her fingers inside you when you finally felt the tightly coiled spring inside of you snap, shockwaves of pleasure washing over you as you let your head fall back against the pillows. “billie–”

billie reveled in the pleasure written all over your face, continuing to eat you out to drag out your orgasm until your hips jerked away from her mouth. after leaving a gentle nip on your inner thigh and sucking a soft hickey there, she dragged herself up to join your lips together. her tongue slipped between your lips, letting you taste yourself as your hands travelled down to her waist and pulled her closer to you so she was straddling your hips.

“see?” she murmured softly as she looked down at you from where she sat on top of you, “no one else can do it like i can.”

your lips twitched up into a smile and you leaned in to press another loving kiss to her lips, “oh, sweet girl. there was never any doubt. you’re my only girl, forever and always.”

୨ৎ taglist : @47lake @st0nerlesb0 @n0vabug @darkside-0f-the-sun @asterisk-eyes @amara-eilish @dragoneyelashart

send an ask or comment here to be added <3

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drunkinyourbenz · 1 month ago

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drunk arguing w billie?

i went slightly overboard i am so sorry anon

୨ৎ i don't wanna talk right now. b.e

୨ৎ billie eilish x fem!reader

୨ৎ genre: angst

୨ৎ content: fighting (duh), billie's drunk, toxic relationship, emotional abuse (?), billie's a bitch, dont wanna spoil anything else js read it babe <3

୨ৎ taglist: @47lake @st0nerlesb0 @n0vabug @darkside-0f-the-sun @asterisk-eyes

୨ৎ note: sorry in advance <3

you were anxious, to say the least. you knew it had gotten bad again for billie, that much was obvious. but you’d expected her to maybe… talk to you about it. after a year and a half of dating, you felt like perhaps you could be someone she trusted enough to turn to. but you weren’t.

it was nothing personal, you supposed. she wasn’t talking to anyone about it—not finneas, not zoe, not even maggie. she had a tendency to close herself off, and you knew that was something she had to work through herself.

…but that didn’t stop the fact that you were up at eleven thirty at night, wondering when your girlfriend would come home. you felt sick with worry, your stomach turning in the most heart wrenching way. what if something was going really badly wrong? what if it was worse than you thought?

you couldn’t take your mind off it, no matter what you did. you’d even dragged yourself into the kitchen to bake some cookies, thinking that maybe having something else to focus on would ease your worries. but no, after every cup of flour and every pinch of salt, your mind drifted back to her. you almost burnt the cookies because of how heavy your heart was with worry.

recently, she’d been getting home later and later, and although you acted as if nothing had changed, you could remember vividly every hour where you wondered where she was, if she was okay. most nights, she would get home around ten pm, crawling into bed with you and wrapping her arms around you. the feeling of her head buried in the crook of your neck brought far more comfort than it should, considering the situation.

earlier in your relationship, she would get home at around six, maybe eight. either way, you’d have time to spend together. you ate dinner together like a normal couple, and sometimes you had movie nights. it didn’t matter what you did, because you were together.

but now, you weren’t sure if you’d eaten dinner together once in the past two weeks.

each time she got home late, you could smell the alcohol on her. it wasn’t that strong, but it was the pattern that worried you. all signs were pointing towards a downward spiral, and she wouldn’t even talk to you, her own girlfriend.

upon hearing the door open abruptly, you looked up from where you’d been staring blankly at the chocolate chip cookies as they cooled. you pursed your lips as you heard the door slam, and you suddenly didn’t want to see billie anymore. you’d been so anxious about where she was, so eager to finally see her again, but… you didn’t want to see her, not like this.

but it was her house too, so soon enough, stumbling footsteps could be heard through the hallway, and you heard her lazily kick her shoes off at the door. it didn’t take long for her to come into view as she walked into the living room that was connected to the kitchen you were in. she dumped her bag on the couch, shrugging her jacket off while she was at it.

she did a double take when she saw you, as if she’d expected you to just be fast asleep in bed. she froze for a second or two, before letting out a heavy sigh.

there was no other sign of acknowledgement, she walked to the sink and grabbed a glass of water, looking past you as if you didn’t exist. you could’ve sworn you felt your heart sink—this was worse than usual.

closing your eyes briefly, you inhaled deeply, you were well aware she hadn’t been talking to finneas or maggie about this—you’d just gotten off the phone with a very concerned maggie, and you felt so guilty for not being able to assure her that everything was fine, that her daughter was okay. because you truly didn’t know.

the silence that hung over the room was heavy and uncomfortable, making you feel strangely claustrophobic. you knew that the silence would have to be broken eventually, so you spoke. you skipped the usual ‘how was your day’ and simply got straight to the point. “...are you okay?”

her head snapped up as if she’d been snapped out of a daze, and she looked at you as if she were suddenly seeing you for the first time. you watched as she swallowed, and finally forced herself to speak in a whisper. “...i don’t know.” billie replied blankly, and you felt your heart ache at her tone. it was as if she had already accepted that fact, and wasn’t going to do anything to drag herself out of the pool of endless self destruction.

“is there anything i can do, my love?”

in the past, that sentence would have had her collapsing into your arms, letting you hold her until she felt even a little bit better. this time, however, just she looked at you for a moment. behind that cold facade, you could’ve sworn you saw something flash in her eyes–hope? love? you weren’t sure, because it disappeared as quickly as it’d flashed over her face.

her voice came out harsher than you’d expected when she spoke, “you could leave me alone.”

you simply blinked in surprise. you weren’t going to push her to talk to you about it, obviously, but it confused you that she was resorting to this…meanness. she didn’t just say it like she needed space—which, in reality, was something she had gotten a lot of lately—she said it like you were the issue. like you had caused everything wrong in her life at the moment. that stung more than you thought it would.

however, you didn’t want to be that pushy girlfriend who couldn’t let things go, so you just nodded slowly, trying to hide the concern still in your voice. “i mean, if that’s what you need…”

the two of you stood in the kitchen for what felt like hours—it was probably just five minutes, but the tense silence was suffocating. you wanted to say something, to help her, but what could you do that she wouldn’t just scoff at and ignore?

abruptly, interrupting the strangling silence, billie stood up. in her haste, she knocked over a glass on the table, and you flinched as you watched it fall to the floor and shatter. billie didn’t spare the broken glass a single glance as she snapped, “you know what?”

your eyes dart between billie and the glass before settling on your girlfriend, looking at the uncharacteristic anger in her expression. “what?”

“i hate that you do this! you never push me to talk! you never help me! you never…” she trailed off, running out of words to say but certainly not running out of anger.

“excuse me?” you raised an eyebrow, “haven’t you noticed the way i’ve been doing absolutely everything i can to help for months? everything. no matter what i do, you push me away. you push everyone away—i just got a call from maggie, who was crying because she’s so worried about you. i can’t do shit to help if you don’t want to be helped, billie. no one can.”

her mouth fell open, and she spent a minute just staring at you. you could see the debate she was having with herself in her mind, the way she was wondering whether to follow the rational or emotional part of her brain. you could tell that she knew you were right, but it looked like her frustration was too intense and her mind was too clouded by alcohol to actually think properly.

the anger won, as it had been a lot recently. you were right, of course. you always were when it came to her—you knew her better than you knew yourself.

“shut up! you’re not helpful, and you can’t fix me! you can’t fix anything!” her voice was only raising in volume, and she stepped closer to you, a finger jabbing the air between you to emphasise her words.

you subconsciously took an instinctive step backwards as she stepped towards you, your back hitting the countertop. “then tell me what i can do!”

billie scoffed, “you can leave! you can ignore it like you usually do!” she was yelling at this point, “you can be useless like you usually are!”

you visibly flinched at those last words. part of your brain reminded you that she’s drunk, she doesn’t mean it, but the other half was shouting at you about how drunk words are sober thoughts. your mind was racing at this point, was that really how little she thought of you? you swallowed heavily before speaking softly, “do you…do you really think i don’t care?”

momentarily, she seemed to recognise the hurt on your face, and something like guilt appeared in her eyes. said guilt didn’t last, and the anger was rushing back even more all-consuming than it had been before, “of course you don’t care!”

you stared at her in disbelief—did she genuinely believe you didn’t care? did she not see all the effort you put in for her? you opened your mouth to speak, but she bet you to it.

“you know what?” she didn’t give you time to speak, she just rushed into her point. “i wish you weren't even here. i’d be better off dealing with this alone. without your stupid, useless attempts to help.”

yet again, you stared at her in shock. you didn’t think you could be more hurt in one night even if you tried. she’s drunk, you kept telling yourself, but deep down you knew that wasn’t an excuse. if she loved you, she wouldn’t say these things. once again, she continued before you could get a word in. her anger was consuming her in her drunken state, there was no thought behind her words, just the first insults she could find.

“you’re a fucking burden, you know that? i don’t need you, i don’t want you, you’re just in the way. always in the fucking way!”

just when you thought it couldn’t get worse, she went there. you froze in place, taking a long moment to just stare at her in disbelieving silence. “...what did you just say?”

noticing that her words finally seemed to hit a nerve, she only pushed further, “you heard me. you always have been.”

that hit like a slap in the face, leaving you speechless. you truly didn’t know what to say, it didn’t feel like you were looking at the love of your life anymore. this was a stranger, someone you knew so well but at the same time knew absolutely nothing about. you weren’t sure when the first tear had fallen, but they were now streaming down your cheeks.

“you–” billie opened her mouth to continue, but you interrupted her.

“that’s enough.” your voice was shaky but surprisingly firm, and at your firm tone, billie pauses. her mouth was still open to continue, but then she looked at you. she really looked at you, and saw the tears on your cheeks and the look in your eyes.

it was as if she were seeing you for the first time in the whole night, and you watched as the angry mask crumbled right in front of your eyes. after watching her for a moment, your eyes trailed down to the floor as you took a deep breath, wanting to look anywhere except for her.

“fuck,” she murmured, her breathing shallow as she seemed to actually realise what she’d just said.

“i-i’m sorry–” billie whispered, her voice weak as she looked at you, reaching out for your arm and only causing you to shift away from her so she couldn’t touch you. you watched as her eyes widened in panic at your avoidance of her touch, as the weight of her words seemed to sink in. “i didn’t mean it–you know that–”

you give her a look, raising an eyebrow, “really? because you had a lot to say.”

“i love you. you know that.”

those three words didn’t feel like they held the same meaning as they used to, they weren’t giving you the butterflies you used to get. actions speak louder than words, and her actions were greatly lacking. “then start acting like it.”

“how?” her voice was a whisper, barely audible.

you swallowed, looking down at the floor and then back at her. it felt like her fist was in your chest, ripping your heart out. it physically hurt you to have this conversation.

“i can’t spell it out for you, billie. you used to show it, you’ll figure it out if you want to. if you really can’t, i think that says something for itself.”

in your mind, you silently wished for her to say something. to say she can try, she can fix this. but you weren’t sure how much was even left to fix, after all these months of cracks spreading through your relationship and pushing you further apart. but you remembered. you remembered when the two of you use to dance through the kitchen just because you felt like it. you remembered staying up all night cuddled up in bed having whispered conversations about absolutely nothing and everything at the same time. it hadn’t been like that in a long time, but you knew that both of you remembered it as if it were yesterday.

and despite it all, despite how much billie wanted to beg you to stay, to do everything she possibly could to cling to you until she somehow mended all the broken patches in your relationship, she knew you were right. she couldn’t let you tell her how to fix this, she’d have to figure it out by herself.

and she didn’t know how, so she let you stand up and walk out the door.

which, its own cruel way, was an answer in itself.

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